drabbles
act one flashbacks 1: Khan fixing a young Uzi toy gun, telling her how you can fix anything if you try. 2: Nori with young Uzi, telling her how important it is to seek answers, even if someone wants to keep it secret 3: Doll explaining why she thinks uzi should suffer? 4: Thad explaining why he was never mean to Uzi? - uzi asks him whether he’d fight the murder drones - we all play roles. i like to be chill, cheer drones up. smile and make smiles - does that make you a cheerleader? - heh, kinda - echo the play ball, peak in highschool, be the guy thought of foldly, but not highly
act two dreams 5: uzi had been watched all her life, she hates the eyes staring at her, it seemed like no one ever saw through to the real her. except those piercing blue eyes. it seemed like they had seen deeper than anyone else — and uzi hated that.
like an illusion 6: like an impulse 7: like an inverse 8: like an inheritance
- add a few more days of uzi & n following the drones to pad out time so that it lines up with v’s plotline
:criminal: the truth is you’re putting upon a pedestal something that never really mattered when “what happened in 11” is presented as a mystery, it’s illuzion wondering that, because she and only she had her memory wiped you’ve already seen everything that mattered in 11 in the flashbacks Uzi was under a lot of stress from being surrounded by drones demanding her help, she was making no progress unraveling all the mysteries, and her solver was slowly awakening and filling her head with urges and intrusive thoughts and she didn’t have N there to give her any reprieve from any of this. so eventually she snaps and goes on a solver-catalyzed rampage then, faced with all the oil on her hands and the fact that it felt amazing, she represses all of that she’s ashamed of it, scared that it’ll change how N sees her. (not scared he won’t love her anyway — scared that he shouldn’t. scared that if this doesn’t change anything, if it’s all the same to him, did it ever matter that she was once a good person? scared that if he still accepts her, why would she ever want to change?) so that shameful bloodlust gets locked away and ferments in her nightmares while she eases back into normality with N except she’s never fully relaxing, because even when N comforts her, he’s not addressing the real thing that has her uneasy, deep down. and then J’s there. J, at whom she can bare her fangs openly, and lash out with no remorse. J, who saw her at her worse and still can’t resist. J, who gives her something more enticing than consolation — encouragement it was never supposed to be uncertain why Uzi ended up Like That. her heart was opaque because she held herself at a distance N couldn’t reach her, and when she fell he couldn’t catch her. Uzi fell first, J fell harder
impulze’s memories of hunting manifests as visions to uzi
J tells Inverze she has to look out for number one? only cutthroat business survives
uzi starts to feel N makes her weak, and she needs to be strong
Re: how v treated N - did that take more love, or less?